15 or something like that

A Facebook thread went out tonight having you pick 15 movies that will always stay with you and you had to do it in 15 minutes or less to complete it. It was a little tricky because most the movies on my mind lately are ones that my daughters are watching over and over, thus Disney would have been the top 10. But here are the ones I picked and a little sentence or two as to why I did so. In the comment section feel free to leave your 15.

1. Empire Strikes back

     This was my favorite movie as a kid, probably still is to this day. It had great characters (All the OG's as well as Boba Fett, Lando, Yoda, Ton-Tons) and an amazing story line... what more do you want from a movie?

2. Dumb and Dumber

     I know many of you will disagree, but this was the funniest movie of my generation! I cried so hard my chest hurt throughout the entire movie. I know I went back atleast once more that first night, maybe twice. I think I saw this movie 10 to 15 times in one week (of course movie tickets were only $4 or $5 back then) and probably 30 times overall.

3. Happy Gilmore

      This might be a close tie for funniest movie of my generation. How do you not put a movie in your top 15 when you know every word of the entire movie (well I didn't put Nightmare Before Christmas- that was more of a fad). So many great lines.

4. Outsiders

     Not sure why this was on my top 15, but it was actually the first movie that came to mind. It was just a tough movie- Over the years it has continued to Stay Golden! Funny, how many kids I work with now have never even heard of this flick.

5. LOTR

     Peter Jackson actually brought Frodo and crew to life. For the most part what you read in the book is what you saw on the screen. Amazing.

6. It's A Wonderful Life

    I was a little surprised this made my list, but I watch it every year and try to hold back tears. One of the greatest Christmas movies ever made. 

7. Life is Beautiful

     I'm trying to think of any foreign films I had seen previous to this, I'm sure there is one or two, but really this was the movie that brought me to see the beauty of international films. 

8. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

      A tender, serious movie by Jim Carrey and he nailed it. You know a movie is good when it makes you evaluate the relationships you have with others.

9. Beauty and the Beast

     I watched this movie when I was 17 or 18 after a terrible Halloween. I was sitting at home alone and I noticed my nieces copy on top of the tv.  A friend of mine, Loved! I  mean Loved this movie, so I thought what's the harm. She was right. Afterwards my world was not so bad and I had a new love in my life... Belle. 

10. Saving Private Ryan

      The first scene of the troops storming the beach is why this movie made my list. I went with a friend of mine (she picked the movie, I had no  idea what it was about) to the Edwards Palace. All I remember was having to give her my hoodie so she could hide her face and cry. It was one of the first movies that actually made you feel like you where in the midst of the war... it was ugly and brutal.

11. The Matrix

       It was just such a weird movie, The special effects were amazing and the story was so extremely different than the movies that were out there.

12. The Wizard of Oz

       C'mon, it's the Wizard of Oz! I loved it as a kid, and my kids love it now. The movie has stood up against the test of time.

13. O Brother Where Art Thou

       Great music and a endearing tale. George Clooney's not my favorite actor, but he did a great job.

14. Spinal Tap

        Probably the greatest movie about music of all time. Extremely funny. 

15. Say Anything

        An intelligent 80's teen movie (I stole that from IMBD). Seriously, Llyod Dobler gave every average guy Hope! Maybe, that's not such a good thing though, I remember calling up my high school cheerleading crush.... it didn't go so well.

A Living Parable

I need to get something to eat, it's been eight hours since I had eaten and now I’m famished. My stomach was letting me know it’s not pleased with my neglect, grumbling at me in a deep angry bottomless growl. The streets of downtown are unusually quiet for a 2 am Sunday morning.  The bars are closing but, the crowds are not stumbling out. The all-night fast food drive thru’s are not packed with hungry bar hoppers, only littered with a car here or there. It’s unusual. It quiet, like a ghost town. Dead like a zombie movie.

I’ve been out too long, I should have probably been back at work five or ten minutes earlier, but I was enjoying the empty streets, the stillness of the lonely town with looming buildings casting night shadows. It was one of those moments where you just don’t want to go back to the monotony that awaits you. Somehow, I missed my mark. I missed my street. I hate one-way streets, I always forget they’re there.  Now, I have to drive down an extra block or two to get back to the right parking area.  Outside the passenger side window, I see something moving. Something becomes someone. On the sidewalk is sitting a homeless man with face looking towards the ground. Probably on any other night the man wouldn’t have caught my eye, but this was an early Sunday morning downtown that’s been neglected of throngs of college kids. The homeless man and me are the only people on the street. It’s eerie and uncomfortably strange.

As I pass by in my truck the man looks up, his face and gray chest-length beard are covered in blood as is the concrete and sleeping bag where he is sitting. He’s making silent moans, crying. It’s creepy. He looks like a zombie in this post-apocalyptic vacant night. I wouldn’t have been surprised if he was feasting on the remains of another.  But he's not an undead-flesh eater, he's a man and someone had beaten this man to a pulp. Pummeled him on the sidewalk.

My foot taps the brakes to slow down and see if the man is all right, but before I can think clearly, my foot changes directions and hits the gas. I’m late getting back to work and I don’t feel like hearing my co-workers crap about taking too long, I rationalize to myself. I tell myself, he’s probably a drunk and picked a fight with someone. He probably deserved to get the crap beat out of him. I’ve seen his type too often and no doubt I’ll see him soon at my work. Besides, I have a burger and fries I need to attend to before they get cold.  

Back at work, my partner leaves to get his own lunch. I’m left in the cave, an empty darkened room  with nothing but my thoughts to keep me comfort and at the moment they are not doing a very good job. As I settle in, content eating my slightly unsatisfying sirloin burger and cold greasy fries, I am struck by one of those uncomfortable thoughts. A parable remembered. My head is visibly jolted from excruciating contemplation.  My soul is bleeding. I just became a living parable of un-neighborliness.

On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?"

"What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?"

He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

"You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live."

But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?"

In reply Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side.  So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him.  The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. 'Look after him,' he said, 'and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.'

"Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?"

The expert in the law replied, "The one who had mercy on him."

Jesus told him, "Go and do likewise."

I failed the test of kindness for a warm burger and fries. My heart sank in my own vileness. My broken and bruised spirit cried out silently for the mercy I could not offer, “ Lord, Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me a sinner.”

I picked up the phone and called for someone to check on my neighbor.

NBA, NFL, or ....

Another Forward from work, not sure if it's true or not (I am highly suspect) but I figured I would pass it on anyways

GUESS WHICH ONE.......
 Even if you aren't a sports fan this is very interesting!

36 have been accused of spousal abuse

7 have been arrested for fraud

19 have been accused of writing bad checks

117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses

3 have done time for assault 71 repeat 71
cannot get a credit card due to bad credit 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges 8 have been arrested for shoplifting

21 currently are defendants in lawsuits,
and
84 have been arrested for drunk driving
in the last year


Can
you guess which organization this is?
NBA Or NFL?


Neither,
it's the 535 members of the
United States Congress

The same group of Idiots that crank out
hundreds of new laws each year
designed to keep the rest of us in line.

Being good

Groggily, I awoke from the deep black sleep. Something was cautioning me to get up, my Papa senses were tingling, just then I heard my wife’s voice calling for my daughter, “FAITH!!!! FAITH! FAITH!” It wasn’t the  get-over-here-your-in -trouble yell to which I’ve grown accustom. This was a frantic, sort of terrified scream.

I leaped out of bed, grabbed my jeans as I was running down the hall and somehow managed to slide into them before rushing out the garage door. I was worried because I could hear the worry in my wife’s tone. I went flying by Kellee to try and take control of the situation.  If you’re a parent you understand the fear that grips your heart. I was preparing for the worst; someone had taken my daughter, she was hit by a car, or that kind of thing. I saw nothing. The street was quiet this particular early afternoon, someone must have snatched her.

But before my suspicions could grow, my wife stopped me, “Oh, I’m sorry honey. I can’t find Faith but I think she’s over at Chuck’s house (the boy her age that lives across the street), I’ve already told her not to go over there.”

So, I stood in the middle of our cul-de-sac and screamed at the top of my lungs, “Faith Ann!!!! Get over here now!!!!” A couple of seconds later my daughter peered around the side of Chuck’s house with Chuck following close behind, her chocolate brown eyes doublewide. And she had that look all over her face. I could tell, because it’s one I’ve worn myself a time or two.

I wore the same expression when I was Faith’s age after my parents picked me up from my friends Halloween party where we snuck into the refrigerator and drank a couple of beers. When my parent’s asked, I couldn’t hide the face, I knew I couldn’t lie my way through the lagers.

I wore the same expression the summer before my 9^th grade year, in my summer fling’s backyard, making out in her pool while the parents were gone. When suddenly her Dad appeared and said he had been watching us for ten minutes. I knew I was guilty before the court, and as he told my friends and me, He was the Judge, Jury, and Executioner. I was guilty. Surprisingly though, he was more upset that my friends were jumping off the diving board onto his boogie boards than he was that I was smooching on his daughter.

Anyhow, Faith had the look written all over her face.  We went inside the house and I took my seat on the couch, smiled and very softly began to dialogue with my daughter.

"Did you know your mom told you not to go over to Chuck’s and to stay in our front yard?"

"Yes, Papa."

"So, why did you go over there when you were instructed not to?"

"I don’t know Papa."

"What were you doing on the side of chuck’s house?"

"Um….well, papa we were just talking?"

(Papa senses tingling like crazy!) "What were you talking about?"

"Ummm…about being good! Me and Chuck were just talking about how we need to be good Papa."

"Faith, stick out your tongue."

My daughter reluctantly agreed.

My eyes widened, my nose flared! I told her, “Faith there are huge bumps all over your tongue. You’re lying to me.”

This was an old technique my mom used to sniff out the lies before we knew better.

Faith's doublewide eyes enlarged even more. Now she was starting to shake a little. It probably helped that she had just recently watched Pinocchio.

I shook my head in disappointment, “Faith go to your room and think about what you’re telling me.”

Ten minutes later I called her back out, “Are you ready to tell me the truth?”

“Yes, Papa.”

What were you doing on the side of Chuck’s house.

"Well….ummm... Papa, I just… I just didn’t want you to know that we were not kissing."

"You were not kissing?"

 "Yeah, I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to know that we were not kissing."

"Why would you tell me you were not kissing? I didn’t say anything about kissing. Why would you mention kissing if you were not kissing?"

Sure, I knew the answer, but there was some enjoyment in seeing my daughter squirm through her web of deceit.

Faith looked flustered and confused. She couldn’t untangle this lie.

Kellee stepped in and took over, “So, Faith what you’re really telling us is that you and chuck were kissing."

"Yes."

"What kind of kissing were you doing?"

Every muscle tightened, I didn’t want to hear the answer, but it came nonetheless.

"The good kind."

Faith then proceeded to show us by puckering her lips and making a couple of smooching sounds.

Growing Up Without a Cellphone

This is a Forward I received last night at work. Kinda silly, kinda true.

If you are 30, or older, you might think this is hilarious!
 
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning.... Uphill... Barefoot.... BOTH ways… yadda, yadda, yadda 
 
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on my kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!  

But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today.  You've got it so easy!  I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!   
And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don't know how good you've got it!
 
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have the Internet.  If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!   
 
There was no email!!  We had to actually write somebody a letter - with a pen!   Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox, and it would take like a week to get there!  Stamps were 10 cents! 
 
Child Protective Services didn't care if our parents beat us.  As a matter of fact, the parents of all my friends also had permission to kick our ass! Nowhere was safe! 
 
There were no MP3's or Napsters or iTunes!  If you wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the record store and shoplift it yourself!
 
Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio, and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!  There were no CD players!  We had tape decks in our car...  We'd play our favorite tape and "eject" it when finished, and then the tape would come undone rendering it useless.  Cause, hey, that's how we rolled, Baby!  Dig?
 
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting!  If you were on the phone and somebody else called, they got a busy signal, that's it! 
 
There weren't any freakin' cell phones either.. If you left the house, you just didn't make a damn call or receive one. You actually had to be out of touch with your "friends". OH MY GOD !!!  Think of the horror... not being in touch with someone 24/7!!!  And then there's TEXTING.  Yeah, right.  Please!  You kids have no idea how annoying you are. 

And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was!  It could be your school, your parents, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, the collection agent.. you just didn't know!!!  You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

We didn't have any fancy PlayStation or Xbox video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics!  We had the Atari 2600!  With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'.  Your screen guy was a little square!  You actually had to use your imagination!!!  And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen... Forever!  And you could never win..  The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died!  Just like LIFE! 

You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing!  You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel!!!  NO REMOTES!!!  Oh, no, what's the world coming to?!?!
 
There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning.  Do you hear what I'm saying? We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-finks!

And we didn't have microwaves..  If we wanted to heat something up, we had to use the stove!  Imagine that!    

And our parents told us to stay outside and play.. all day long.  Oh, no, no electronics to soothe and comfort.  And if you came back inside... you were doing chores!  

And car seats - oh, please!  Mom threw you in the back seat and you hung on.  If you were lucky, you got the "safety arm" across the chest at the last moment if she had to stop suddenly, and if your head hit the dashboard, well that was your fault for calling "shot gun" in the first place!  

See!  That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled rotten!  You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980 or any time before!

Regards,
The Over 30 Crowd   

My Daughter the Graduate

Well, we have finally achieved our high hopes and dreams for Faith's future! Of course you should know this was not her first choice, she remind me again that In-N-Out is really only the second best option in her life, "Their cheeseburger is good, but not as good as McDonalds."